I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
