We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
