I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
