I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
