Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
