I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize
