i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
