margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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