Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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