she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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