he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
