ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
We need to rekindle our bromance
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
