Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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