i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
