It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
accomplished twins. life is a go
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
