I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
