some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
This toilet bowl is my home.
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