weddingsv make me drug and hornr
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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