Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
