so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Randomize
