Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Randomize
