you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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