Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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