last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
