Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
