how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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