Nicole vs. Life
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
