Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
