Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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