That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
