if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
