Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
