I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Randomize
