For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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