38 yer olds are good kisserssss
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
