I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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