just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Randomize
