Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
a search helicopter?!
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
