i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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