She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
