I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
