He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
