google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I feel like abortions should bother me more
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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