My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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