I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
