Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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