I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
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