He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
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