where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Randomize
