Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
